Being the center of attention is hard for me. I am not attention seeking and sometimes even talking about myself in front of a group of people makes me want to crawl behind something and hide. As a general rule, oversharers or attention seeking personalities irritate me. That's not to say I don't talk to people, there are lots of people to whom I whine, bitch, moan, and ramble. But, things that are truly important are not what I want to discuss with a large group.
This relationship I have found myself in is important to me. I am so excited about it that it scares me. When things scare me, or I get overwhelmed, I tend to retreat into myself to process or protect whatever I'm excited about.
I don't generally overshare with strangers or acquaintances. I don't like my shit out for all the world to see. (Yet here I am "discussing" it....stupid irony.) In other words, the idea of changing my relationship status on facebook from "single" to "in a relationship" is equal parts stupid and scary to me. But, I did it to make someone happy. (He doesn't know this blog exists, not yet.)His reasons for wanting me to change it seemed more sound than my hesitations. My favorite crazy friend (who immediately knew that changing such a thing was not done independenly of my own volition) reminded me that relationships are about compromise.
In response, I asked her, "What the hell do I know about such things?"
What I do know is that the interest from people around me is warm, friendly, and should be taken with more grace than I can generally muster up. I also know, that for as happy as it made him (even if I don't understand the reason) it was a minimal gesture.
Now suck it up Sara and deal!
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